One of the hardest things that a special mom has to face is the fact that her special child is not verbal. It is unfortunate that many special children do end up with no verbal skills. This may be due to neurological disorders, muscle weaknesses or other ailments that plague the special needs population. It is even harder when the causes are either un-known or not determined since this leaves no room for the “try-to-fix-it” plan of action.
Therefore, it is no surprise that this issue is one that I struggle with constantly. I worry about Alex’s needs being met in the outside world. The fact that I fully understand my daughter’s grunts, gestures and hand movements is not enough since it still doesn’t give her the tools she needs to allow others to fully understand her. It is a talking world out there. A world that is not forgiving to individuals struggling with the spoken word.
I cannot help but think about what the future will hold for my child. I pray constantly that I will always be there to protect her and interpret her needs to the outside world. I try not to think about the possibilities that someday she may have to fend for herself. I am almost tempted to produce an “Alex” only dictionary. One that can open the doors for others to understand her special signs.
In spite of her language deficit, Alexandra has struggled to learn a few simple words that she can verbalize. It is no doubt that the most important of them is “Ma Ma”. She has always been able to vocalize this word and says it proudly. This must be due to the special bond and love that her and I share that encourages her to say it so clearly.
She has recently surprised me with another form of a word that she has learned. A word that sounds like “..hpee”. She says this with a big smile on her face, as she looks my way. For anyone else, this may sound like baby talk, but for me, it is as clear as day. For only a special mom can interpret the meaning of this one. Only a special mom would know that her child is saying “happy”. Only a special mom would feel blessed and thank God that she has not failed in keeping her child happy….
©Copyright 2008.Najwa S. Hirn. All rights reserved.
